That's where they get their boo's.
Monday, April 30, 2012
Sunday, April 29, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Friday, April 27, 2012
The teacher said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without looking up, the little girl replied, "They will in a minute."
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
But it is not true that the value of 3 is called Eskimo pi.
Monday, April 23, 2012
Sunday, April 22, 2012
Saturday, April 21, 2012
Friday, April 20, 2012
Thursday, April 19, 2012
Wednesday, April 18, 2012
Monday, April 16, 2012
Sunday, April 15, 2012
Saturday, April 14, 2012
Roger was very thin because he was so afraid to spend money for food. He looked forward to the day when his grandfather would die and leave him a fortune.
The grandfather died but all he left Roger was a cookie. They came to Roger looking for the fortune but couldn’t find it because it had disappeared into the thin heir.
Friday, April 13, 2012
Thursday, April 12, 2012
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Tuesday, April 10, 2012
"Well, I, uh," she stammered. "I think I, uh, might be a nymphomaniac."
"I see," he said. "I can help you, but I must advise you that my fee is $80 an hour."
"That's not bad," she replied. "How much for all night?"
Monday, April 9, 2012
Sunday, April 8, 2012
The next day, the little boy went past the church with the preacher outside. Two wheels fell off and the boy shouted, “God damn!” Again the preacher said, “Son, don’t say that, say ‘God bless.’” The boy put the wheels on again and goes home.
The next day, the little boy went past the church, again with the preacher outside. Three wheels fell off and the boy shouted, “God damn!” Again the preacher said, “Son, don’t say that, say ‘God bless.’” The boy put all three wheels back on his wagon and goes home.
On the fourth day, the little boy passed the church. The preacher was standing outside and all four wheels fell off the wagon. The boy looked at the wagon and said, “God bless.” Suddenly, all four wheels jumped back on the wagon and the preacher said, “GOD DAMN!”
Saturday, April 7, 2012
Finally the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship. "How do you feel about sex?" he asked, rather trustingly.
"Well," she says, responding carefully, "I'd have to say I would like it infrequently."
The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment. Then, looking over his glasses, he looked her in the eye casually asking, "Was that one word or two?"
Friday, April 6, 2012
The priest puts his head on the block, they pull the rope and nothing happens -- he declares that he's been saved by divine intervention-- so he's let go .
The lawyer is put on the block, and again the rope doesn't release the blade, he claims he can't be executed twice for the same crime and he is set free too.
They grab the engineer and shove his head into the guillotine, he looks up at the release mechanism and says, "Wait a minute, I see your problem...."
Thursday, April 5, 2012
Wednesday, April 4, 2012
This guy and his wife were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning and he said to her, “If I were to die suddenly, I want you to immediately sell all my stuff.”
“Now why would you want me to do something like that?” she asked.
“I figure that you would eventually remarry and I don’t want some other asshole using my stuff.”
She looked at him, cocked an eyebrow, and said, “What makes you think I’d marry another asshole?”