Marvin was in his usual place in the morning sitting at the table, reading the paper after breakfast. He
came across an article about a beautiful actress that was about to
marry a football player who was known primarily for his lack of IQ and
turned to his wife with a look of question on his face. “I’ll never
understand why the biggest jerks get the most attractive wives.”
Did you hear about the TV weatherman who, despite his training and sparkling credentials, ran into a terrible unlucky streak?
became something of a local joke. The town’s newspaper began keeping a
record of his predictions. A year later, the paper reported that he’d
been wrong almost three hundred times in a single year.
Unable to handle the pressure, the station manager fired him.
the meteorologist moved far away and applied for another job as a TV
weathermen. When he got to the question on the application about why he
had left his last job, he wrote, “The climate didn’t agree with me.”
A college senior took his new girlfriend to a football game.
young couple found their seats in the crowded stadium and was watching
the action when a substitute was sent into the game. As the promising
young player ran onto the field to take his position, the boy pointed at
him and said to his girlfriend, “Keep an eye on that fellow. I expect
him to be our best man next year.”
His girlfriend snuggled closer to him and said, “That’s the strangest proposal I ever heard, but I accept!”.
One afternoon a young bank teller met her aunt downtown for lunch.
the meal, the older woman asked her niece to deposit her paycheck at
the bank where the girl worked. She told her aunt she would be happy to,
however on her way back to work, the girl’s purse was snatched.
“Help, help,” she screamed at a passing cop. “That man has taken my aunt’s pay - he’s taken my aunt’s pay!”
“OK, lady,” said the cop. “Cut out the pig latin and tell me exactly what happened.”
During its heyday, the Wells Fargo Company employed a number of specialized
stagecoaches such as one with a church for Sunday operation. One of the
more popular models featured a darkroom on board, so passengers who took
pictures could have them processed en route and the prints delivered at their
One day a stagecoach equipped with a darkroom was headed for Wichita when,
passing through a small town, it was intercepted by the local marshall, who
said, "Halt in the name of the law!"
"What's the problem?" the stagecoach driver asked.
"You should know that the operation of a mobile darkroom is illegal in Kansas,"
the marshall said.
At this point two psychologists on horseback arrived on the scene. One of
them said, "I suppose what we have here is a classic case of the Oedipus
The other said, "No, it's much simpler than that -- it's just an arrested stage