Karma

There's a new restaurant in town called Karma. They don't serve sandwiches, pasta, or other types of meals. Just desserts. #lamejoke 

Tinnitus

I called the tinnitus helpline last night. Nobody answered, just kept ringing. #lamejoke 

Robin

You might not get to be the next Robin Hood, but it Sherwood be fun. #lamejoke

Burglary

Interviewer: There has been an increase in home burglary in London, Dr. Watson. Can you give us some advice? Dr. Watson: Sure, lock homes. #lamejoke

Train

Joey had to take his son to the ER because he swallowed a toy train. Doc said he bit off more than he could choo. #lamejoke 

Posture

I had an appointment with a posture specialist. She stood me up. #lamejoke 

Pains

I was on the sofa last night watching TV, when my wife from the bedroom yelled, "Do you ever get pains on your chest like someone has a voodoo doll and they're stabbing it?" I replied, "No." Then she asked, "How about now?” #lamejoke

Breakfast

What the cannibal had with breakfast? A cup of Joe. #lamejoke 

Bones

I wrote a play about broken bones. Now all I need is a cast. #lamejoke 

Geese

I made a nature documentary about geese, but it was rated R. Prolly too much fowl language. #lamejoke

Bats

Why bats are the only animal whose poop has a special name? I really don’t guano know. #lamejoke 

Snack

A cannibal’s favorite snack? Gram crackers. #lamejoke

Chbickens

Chickens are so greedy. They’re just out to make a bawk. #lamejoke 

Bankruptcies

I'm reading a book about bankruptcies. Currently on chapter 11. #lamejoke

Decorator

Joey got fired from his job as a set decorator. He left without making a scene. #lamejoke

Ring

Bought my wife a mood ring. When she is in a good mood, it turns green. When she is in a bad mood, it leaves a red mark on my forehead. #lamejoke 

Laughter

With laughter, the L comes first and the rest comes aughter. #lamejoke

Hotel

Look, I don't want to sound conceited, but, when I left the hotel, I'm pretty sure that the receptionist was checking me out. #lamejoke

Scarecrow

Why am I so good at being a scarecrow? Hay, it’s in my jeans. #lamejoke 

Chapel

I hear the Sistine Chapel has a lot of ceiling fans. #lamejoke

Olympics

I really enjoyed hearing all of the national anthems played at the Olympics. I love country music. #lamejoke 

Soldiers

Where baby soldiers come from? The infant tree. #lamejoke

Custodians

Why most custodians are car guys? They like things that go broom, broom. #lamejoke 

Defibrillator

It’s very rare that a defibrillator fails, but when it does, nobody is shocked. #lamejoke 

Castle

When a castle performs poorly at work, it gets demoted. #lamejoke

Oil

Where Oil of Olay comes from? Old bullfighters maybe? #lamejoke

Balloon

A balloon's least favorite kind of music? Pop. #lamejoke 

Origami

I passed my origami test yesterday when I turned my paper into the teacher. #lamejoke

Diet

I’ve lost a lot of weight by wearing bread on my head. It’s a new loaf hat diet I’m trying #lamejoke

Martini

 The Charles Dickens martini. Olive or twist? #lamejoke