Monday, April 27, 2015

A mighty eagle soared across the sky. He was the lord of all he surveyed, and what he surveyed was far and wide, for he was several miles above the land.

Peering down from this lofty height, he spied a tiny field mouse scampering through the tall grass. "Lunch," he thought. Curling his wings ever so slightly he banked to the left, and cut a slow, lazy spiral in the sky, until he was far behind the unsuspecting rodent. Then, pulling his wings in tight to his body, the eagle fell into a nose dive straight toward the tiny animal. At the last second, he spread his wings wide to slow himself down, and snatched the field mouse up in his mighty beak. Pounding his wings against the air as hard as he could, he once again reached his former height, where he swallowed the poor mouse whole.

But the field mouse was clever. Knowing he could be digested in moments, and finding no escape through the tightly-clenched beak, the rodent instead crawled deeper down the mighty bird's gullet, swam quickly through the stomach acids, and wriggled through the eagle's intestines, until, nestle in the colon, he stuck his head out though the bird's anus.

He looked down, and saw the ground far, far away.

"How high up are we?" he asked, in a timid little voice.

The eagle responded, in stentorian tones: "Fifteen thousand feet above sea level."

The little mouse look down again, and asked: "You wouldn't shit me, would you?"

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