What’s a monster’s favorite dessert?

I scream!

What do you call a cow that you can’t see?

Invisibull.

Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music?

Because he broke the record!

Singing in the shower is all fun and games until you get shampoo in your mouth.

Then it becomes a soap opera.

What is the fastest liquid on earth?

Milk, because it's pasteurized before you see it.

The word “diputseromneve” may look ridiculous…

but backwards it’s even more stupid…

Joey said to the doctor, "Can you give me something for my liver?"

He handed Joey a pound of onions.

Did you know that humans eat more bananas than monkeys?

It’s true – when was the last time you ate a monkey?

What's the worst thing about ancient history class?

The teachers tend to Babylon.

How many optometrists does it take to change a light bulb?

1 or 2? 1... or 2?

It’s really difficult to find what you want on eBay....

Joey was searching for cigarette lighters and found over 15,000 matches.

How does Darth Vader like his toast? 

On the dark side.

I walked into the dentist’s and said, “I think I’m a moth.”

The dentist said, “I don’t think you should be here. You need to see a psychiatrist.”

I said, “I am seeing a psychiatrist.”

He said, “Then what are you doing here?”

I said, “The light was on.”

What do you call it when you lend money to a bison?

 A buff-a-loan!

Joey's dad has started wearing Joey's mom's clothes. And his mom has started wearing his dad's clothes.

They're becoming transparent.

He says that it's kind of a drag....