Salmon

My buddy was telling me about his new hobby of photographing salmon in different outfits.  He said that it’s as easy as shooting fish in apparel.  #lamejoke 

Locksmith

I’ve written a song about a locksmith. There’s a lovely key change at the end.  #lamejoke

Dogs

Thousands of years ago, some stray dogs wandered into the Australian outback looking for food. It dingo so well.  #lamejoke

Möbius

Joey makes Möbius strips for living. It’s a strange way to make ends meet. #lamejoke

Roux

Back when I cooked more often, I never really understood roux. Ahhh, the pot thickens…. #lamejoke

Food

The food that weighs less than two tons? Wonton. #lamejoke

Abacus

I got an imaginary abacus for my birthday. I guess it's the thought that counts. #lamejoke

Blender

Cannibals like to keep a blender on their front porches. They enjoy greeting their friends with warm hand shakes. #lamejoke

Computers

I’m old enough to remember when computers only came with a keyboard. Initially I couldn’t see the point of a mouse. Then it clicked.  #lamejoke

Hand

I’m not saying I need a hand, but here’s the Thing…. #lamejoke

Bee

If you’re being bothered by a bee, just look at it.  Seeing is bee leaving.  #lamejoke

Math

Not all math puns are funny….just sum.  #lamejoke

Jacket

A guy in a leather jacket told me if I gave him a hundred bucks, after six weeks he would pay me $500.  Turned out to be a Fonzi scheme.  #lamejoke

Hair

Joey started losing his hair at a young age. Everyone saw him as old so he went out and bought a cheap wig.  It was a small price to pay.  #lamejoke 

Cheese

Ate my last piece of cheese last night, and today, it's raining.  Ain’t no sunshine when cheese gone. #lamejoke