Kiev

People from Kiev must be very tall. U kraine your neck to see them.  #lamejoke

Hymns

A small church was raising funds for a new piano. On Sunday, the pastor said, “Whoever gives the most money today for the offering can pick out three hymns.” So they passed the basket around and the pastor saw a $100 bill in there. He said “Looks like we have a winner! Whoever gave the $100 bill can come to the front and select three hymns.”An 80 year old woman got up, walked to the front, and, pointing her finger at the congregation, said, “I’ll take him, him, and him!“ #lamejoke

Scent

When Kim Kardashian released a new scent, everyone called her an entrepreneur. But when Joey released a scent, all his workmates complained. #lamejoke

Shopping

Joey says that shopping with his girlfriend and her friends can be slow as mall lasses. #lamejoke

Room

Two kings and three queens came into my home, but there was barely enough room for everyone. It was a full house. #lamejoke

Wizard

A guy dressed as a wizard told me he’d slowly turn me into a loaf of bread. I laughed, but now I’m starting to wonder. #lamejoke

Monsters

Are monsters good at math? No, not unless you Count Dracula. #lamejoke 

Film

I got cast in the film about a bakery. It’s not a huge part, just a small roll. #lamejoke

Knighted

"The number after nine must be knighted," said Tim certainly. #lamejoke

Nana

Joey has a bad stutter. When he tried to tell me his Nana died, I started singing the Batman theme with him. #lamejoke

Peas

I opened a bag of frozen peas and few rolled onto the floor. I guess they were escapeas. #lamejoke

Billboard

A billboard in Bangkok claimed that unless I lost weight, all music would end. I wondered, “Is this true thin avert Thai sing?” #lamejoke 

Singer

The singer that can never decide if he is human or bovine? Roy or bison. #lamejoke

Cargo

Cargo space? Car no do that. Car go road. #lamejoke 

Pavlov

Pavlov walked into a hotel and rang the bell to summon the front desk clerk. He then snapped his fingers in frustration and said, “Damn, I forgot to feed the dogs.’ #lamejoke