What do you call a witch's garage? 

A broom closet.

What do you give a skeleton for Valentine's Day? 

Bone-bones in a heart-shaped box.

What has webbed feet, feathers, fangs and goes quack-quack? 

Count Duckula.

What's a vampire's favorite fruit? 

A necktarine.

What do you get when you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter? 

Pumpkin Pi.

What does a vampire fear the most? 

Tooth decay.

Why did the ghost go into the bar? 

For the Boos.

Where do fashionable ghosts shop for sheets? 

Bootiques.

Why did the monster’s mother knit him three socks?

She heard he grew another foot!

What do you call a vampire that lives in a kitchen?

Count Spatula.

What is Dracula’s favorite circus act?

He always goes for the juggler!

Two monsters went to a party. Suddenly one said to the other, “A lady just rolled her eyes at me. What should I do?”

“Be a gentleman and roll them back to her.”

What do ghosts eat for supper?

Spooketti.

What do you get if you cross Bambi with a ghost?

Bamboo.

What monster flies his kite in a rain storm?

Benjamin Franklinstein!