It's not easy living near Mrs Potato Head. She keeps sticking her nose where it doesn't belong. #lamejoke

Home Depot wouldn't let me buy a hammer in store. They said that they have to mallet to me. #lamejoke

I managed to bake something on my first try. It was a piece of cake. #lamejoke

The yoyo was originally used in combat during the First Whirled War. #lamejoke

Joey spilled some Jell-o on Prince William, and was accused of pudding on heirs. #lamejoke

Found a summer job earning extra money by sprinkling tiny drops of water every morning on the front yards of rich people. I don't earn much, but I make dew. #lamejoke

Then there was the one about this super powerful vampire. He can't be harmed by the sun. All other vampires pale in comparison. #lamejoke

A pun walks into a room and suddenly the ten people in the room die. Pun in, ten dead. #lamejoke

Most people learn how to redecorate their bathrooms through tile and error. #lamejoke

Lions can see themselves with a mere roar. #lamejoke

Fleas travel from animal to animal by itch hiking. #lamejoke

When you receive your next mink coat, you may want to ask, "Is that faux fur or is that fur real?" #lamejoke

Ever ask yourself, who, in a perfect world, would raise a child? The answer should be apparent. #lamejoke

Forget your pen? No bic deal. #lamejoke

I suggested building beds above each other to save space but the idea was debunked. #lamejoke