Where did the goblin throw the football?

Over the ghoul line.

Why is a ghost such a messy eater?

Because he is always a goblin.

Why did the skeleton go disco dancing?

To see the boogy man.

What's it like to be kissed by a vampire?

It's a pain in the neck.

How is playing a bagpipe like throwing a javelin blindfolded?

You don't have to be very good to get people's attention.

Why are vampires like false teeth?

They come out at night.

What dog can breathe under water?

Scuba Doo.

What is a vampire's least favorite food?

Stake.

Why does Dracula wear patent leather shoes?

Sandals don't look good with his tuxedo.

Why did the vampire need mouthwash?

He had bat breath.

What is in a ghost's nose?

Boogers.

What are ghosts' favorite kinds of streets?

Dead ends.

Psychiatrist: …gninnigeb eht ta trats s'teL ?doohdlihc ruoy tuoba em llet uoy t'nod yhW

Patient: Nice try Doc. But that reverse psychology stuff won’t work on me!

What tops off a ghost's ice cream sundae?

Whipped scream.

Father Robin arrived home and found Mother Robin was not in the nest. Checking their eggs, he discovered one of them was definitely not his. When Ma Robin came back, he pointed to the egg and said sternly, "How come?"

She gave him a sweet smile and replied, "Oh, I just did that for a lark."