Thursday, August 30, 2018

A Swede wouldn’t make a good Beatles song, but a Norwegian would. #lamejoke

Wednesday, August 29, 2018

So then there's the one about the aspiring thief who enters the theatre and steals the spotlight. #lamejoke

Tuesday, August 28, 2018

My flat-Earther friend decided to walk to the edge of the world to prove it's flat. In the end, he came around. #lamejoke

Monday, August 27, 2018

Joey's girlfriend likes wine and cheese, but she hates Meatloaf. I guess two out of three ain't bad. #lamejoke

Sunday, August 26, 2018

Neil Diamond has just bought his new car, a Saab, on eBay. Or, in other words, he got a Swede car online. #lamejoke

Saturday, August 25, 2018

When an escaped prisoner was caught camping out in the woods it was a clear case of criminal in tent. #lamejoke

Friday, August 24, 2018

I like grandfather clocks. Big time. #lamejoke

Thursday, August 23, 2018

I think I'm going to hire the same landscaper I used last year. He was really easy to get a lawn with. #lamejoke

Wednesday, August 22, 2018

My wife is furious at our next door neighbor who sunbathes topless in her backyard. Personally, I'm on the fence.... #lamejoke

Tuesday, August 21, 2018

I don't normally post puns about fractions, but I will if I have two. #lamejoke

Monday, August 20, 2018

We had a new air conditioning system installed. It's really cool. #lamejoke

Sunday, August 19, 2018

I'm looking for some good fish puns. If any come to mind, let minnow. #lamejoke

Saturday, August 18, 2018

An almost enlightened Buddhist was working on the set of Wheel of Fortune. It was near-Vanna. #lamejoke

Friday, August 17, 2018

Joey's wife is really upset that he has no sense of direction, so he packed up his stuff and right. #lamejoke

Thursday, August 16, 2018

I hate it when the grammar police single me out. It seems like a which hunt. #lamejoke

Wednesday, August 15, 2018

The two doritos who were in love were happily in a relationchip. #lamejoke

Tuesday, August 14, 2018

Do you think oranges are willing to become juice, or are they pressed into it? #lamejoke

Monday, August 13, 2018

When I told my wife that we were out of protein powder, she replied, "No whey!" #lamejoke

Sunday, August 12, 2018

He who farts in church sits in his own pew. #lamejoke

Saturday, August 11, 2018

Just to be clear, Joey uses acne medication. #lamejoke

Friday, August 10, 2018

The pregnant bedbug gave birth in the spring. #lamejoke

Thursday, August 9, 2018

Four chickens escaped from a slaughter house by riding out on the back of a sheep. They're still on the lamb. #lamejoke

Wednesday, August 8, 2018

I was friends with a guy that cross bred insects. I liked him at first, but I soon got tired of his ant ticks. #lamejoke

Tuesday, August 7, 2018

His lot in life was to create the world's greatest mosquito repellent. He had a DEET with destiny. #lamejoke

Monday, August 6, 2018

I don't know if I just got hit by freezing rain, but it hurt like hail. #lamejoke

Sunday, August 5, 2018

Nothing tops a plain pizza. #lamejoke

Saturday, August 4, 2018

I took a chance on a used food processor, but no dice. #lamejoke

Friday, August 3, 2018

I hate to be a party pooper. But when you gotta go, you gotta go. #lamejoke

Thursday, August 2, 2018

An architect friend of mine made millions by inventing the upside down house. It is a top cellar. #lamejoke

Wednesday, August 1, 2018

My wife likes to bake. When I asked her to teach me how to make yeast-free bread, she told me that there's no knead. #lamejoke